I am frequently asked where I got the idea to write a book about a girl who receives a pair of magic glasses. There are several answers to this question, but the initial idea was based upon an embarrassing experience from seventh grade.
Growing up, I was “the smart girl in glasses,” a title I am now proud of. But when seventh grade rolled around I decided to shed my studious image, and get contacts. Except it turned out I was pretty inept with small pieces of eyewear. So my contacts were banished to the refrigerator. Right next to the packets of Taco Bell hot sauce.
Anyway, one day at school I was late getting out to lunch, and as I was walking across a field to join my friends, I realized *Newton McNastybooger—one of the cutest boys in school—was heading straight for me! His eyes were fixed intently on mine, and he was smiling!
In that minute, my future flashed before my bespectacled eyes. As Mrs. Newton McNastybooger.
A million thoughts ran through my mind. I wished my friends were here to see this. I wished I hadn’t just scarfed an onion bagel. I wished I hadn’t gotten that out-of-control perm.
As our paths met, I stopped walking. My life was about to change, I knew it.
Right then, Newton brought his hand to his mouth, licked two fingers, and proceeded to slide them down my glasses. And then he just kept walking.
He never said a word to me.
I stepped back, stunned. Newton’s spit settled on my glasses, making everything look hazy. I was now thanking God none of my friends were with me. I wiped my glasses off and continued over to my friends. I never told anyone what happened.
That night, I spent hours learning the finer points of sticking small pieces of plastic into my eyes. And the next morning, I showed up to school in contacts. Because I had learned a valuable lesson. My glasses had magic powers: they repelled boys.
What about you, any embarrassing incidents from seventh grade you wish to share? What do you think I should have said to Newton, who is probably now a very nice man with a brood of his own little McNastyboogers?
*Name has been changed to protect the guilty.